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[Jul. 17th, 2009|05:12 pm] |
Cricket is an entirely fictional game based on nonsense, like Mornington Crescent, isn’t it? W keeps shouting things like “Onions Eleven!” and “International Mouse Face” and “Murdoch felled a redwood hundred” and other gibberish. Total mystery.
I thought I saw vampires on the tube at lunchtime but then I realised I was looking at a window, not a mirror. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 4th, 2009|02:46 pm] |
Did you hear the screaming and the psychotic laughter?
About two hours ago?
There's no way you could have missed it.
It probably made you feel cold and sick with fear.
I'm sorry about that. I tried on some harem pants in Primark and it was the only apropriate response. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 30th, 2009|07:33 pm] |
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I'm just re-watching Top Gear on iPlayer, and when they're in the office trying to get quotes for 17 year olds, the Stig is in the background photocopying his head. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 27th, 2009|08:35 pm] |
This is my favourite moment from Cliff Richard's film Wonderful Life. Cliff, the Shads and their friends decide they're going to make a movie and to prove how easy it can be there's a silly 8 minute montage of them working their way through the hisory of film in silly costumes.
As the only review of this film on IMDB says, "I didn`t understand it then or now".
(contains Bruce Welsh dancing in drag for everyone curious about that.) |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 26th, 2009|09:18 pm] |
Mr W planned a special fun day out today to celebrate the 10th anniversary of our first date.
First we went to the Horniman Museum where they have a Robot Zoo exhibition. I learned about camouflage.

We also saw someone who used to be in The Bill in the aquarium. It seemed rude to photograph him, so I've photoshopped him into this picture.

They also had an exhibition of Polish paper cut pictures.

Then we went to the Royal Festival Hall to see James May's plasticine garden.

Then we went on the London Eye! It's very exciting although it doesn't go very fast.


Then he took me to iKnit! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 25th, 2009|08:08 am] |
Have you ever accidentally kicked a stranger in his bottom in Waterstones?
I have.
And because he was terribly British, after I apologised to him, he apologised to me. |
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| Late night philosophy |
[Jun. 21st, 2009|12:07 am] |
| [ | feeling |
| | thoughtful | ] | I went back to my alma mater Chelsea College of Art & Design on Friday night for the private view of the degree show. Wow that place is bursting with talent. I'd forgotten how much energy there is floating round an art college. Bright young things!
I haven't set foot back in college once in the three years since I graduated so it was weird to be back but wonderful to catch up with some lovely people. Hello Becs!! *waves*
I went and touched one of the weaving looms, just to see if it was real and to check that those blissful art college days were real. Those were the best days of my life, the ones I feel warm happy nostalgia about. I'm sure there were some big panics and lots of stress but it's all rose-tinted now. I'm sure there will be plenty of good things in the future and stuff before that wasn't all bad, but going to Chelsea was the best thing that ever happened to me.
I miss weaving but even if you're brilliant and you believe in your work (neither of which applied to me) then it's still not a guarantee of a career. Besides which, I read something recently which says that people's teenage ambitions are a better predictor of the path their career will take than pretty much any other indicator. That might just be one man's theory but I always wanted to be Alan Coren so perhaps I should stick with information & communication, I don't know that he was much good with yarn. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 13th, 2009|02:54 pm] |
So last night I went to Westfield.
The fact that it was completely empty of people and I had the most pleasing, well serviced, calm shop ever implies that it was a good experience. But the place is designed so the walls close in on you, you can't breathe, find anything, find the exit, work out where you are or ever leave.
It's great for investment shopping - suits for interviews, wedding clothes, branded jeans etc, but not for much else. Bad for everyday stuff, basics, cheap trends, general bargains (and weirdly, bad for shoes).
Didn't see any harem pants. (Hammer!) The one bargain thing they did have was racks and racks of foul ratty t-shirts, ones that look like they've been worn out, slept in, gardened in, burried in the garden, dug up, worn by builders on a very hot day, never been washed and then put on sale at full price in the shops. WTF?
Perhaps it's going to be good for bargains when the sales start, but I wouldn't trust myself to go to the sales there - I'd come home with a heap of stuff I don't want, never come home, or just lie down on the floor and die (and get eaten by teenagers).
Actually I did get a bargain - A soft grey floaty dress which they reduced at the till from £65 to £20 because it was the last one, had lost it's belt and aquired some sneeze which will wash out. I also found a nice green dress in M&S and another wrap dress from New Look. Hopefully my colleagues will now stop wondering how a tramp got into the office.
The Mary Portas charity shop is in THE VILLAGE, the posh bit where Chanel and Miu Miu and Louis Vuitton are. I would have gone in if I hadn't been hyperventilating.
I've just eased my consumer consience by packing up the last of the charity shop stuff and donating it. I also feel my brains turning to mush so I must go and think about serious intelligent things. |
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| What I did on my summer holiday by Lettice |
[Jun. 8th, 2009|04:34 pm] |
| [ | feeling |
| | cheerful | ] |
 Weasel in Stratford-upon-Avon!
 There was some thunder and lightening, and the lightening hit the tree in the garden of Shakespeare's birthplace.
 A nice house. This one has an upper and lower corridor.
 There were lots of Om Nom Nom gardens which made me want to do lots of lovely embroidery.
 Mr W shuns hoods and umbrellas because he is waterproof.
We saw Sam Troughton as Brutus in a very shouty, bloody Julius Caesar, visited lots of cute little tudor house museum things, ate a great deal of food and then came home to dry out. Sleep now. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 30th, 2009|04:33 pm] |
It's a bit too hot today to be lugging a spinning wheel around London, but I did anyway and now it's fixed and I've spun pretty yarn. I need to ply it tonight, hope that works.
Yesterday I wore my hand-knitted February Lady Sweater to work and realised half way through the day that I'd sewn the buttons on the inside so I was wearing it inside out. There wasn't much I could do about it till I got it home. I'm hoping that stupidity is a sign of genius. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 29th, 2009|08:17 am] |
Last night I stepped on a mouse in the dark and screamed like a girl. The mouse ran off very quickly indeed and it was all rather shocking.
I'd been to the theatre to see Captain Becker from Primeval in Much Ado About Nothing which was brilliant and very funny. If you like Becker in a tight t-shirt, you'll love him in over-the-knee boots, breeches and a luxuriant moustache. Beatrice, and Benedick were outstanding. Outdoor Shakespeare really is the business.
We sat behind the most incredible marmalade toupee.
And then I stepped on a mouse outside the theatre. I seem to have spent all week putting my foot in it and really not meaning to.
Does the IMAX Hitler bother anyone else?
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| (no subject) |
[May. 28th, 2009|12:01 pm] |
| [ | feeling |
| | busy | ] | I am knitting the mystery blanket from Yarn Forward and OMG, I am getting nowhere with it. I’ve managed to finish three 8x8 inch squares in about 5 days. It’s an extremely frustrating pattern. I’m using orange and brown acrylic from the chemist because I want it to feel really 70’s.
Anyone fighting the battle of the bulge and/or looking to improve their health and diet might like to watch the BBC show Ten Things You Need To Know About Losing Weight which does what it says on the tin. Most of the things are so small and sensible that I’ve already started to pop some of them into my life and not really noticed.
There’s also a bit of science and a few things I didn’t know. It’s good. And I can confidently state that I now know everything I ever wanted to know about Alex James from Blur’s cheesy faeces. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 24th, 2009|08:29 pm] |
The plans to go and see sheep sheering got shelved because of public transport being rubbish. So to continue the sheep themed weekend, I did some spinning on my little spindle and I went to see the new Star Trek movie to count the sheep.
There are no sheep in the new Star Trek movie.
Spock sported a boring sweater and Scotty wore a beige scarf and a nasty nylon knitted hat which googling suggests may be Link from Zelda hat, although it didn't look pointy to me.
Anyway, yes, Star Trek is everything I wanted it to be and it may be sheepless, but it's a great yarn.
 It's a bit messy, but I think there's enough for an ipod cosy or something else tiny. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 23rd, 2009|06:33 pm] |
Sheep weekend! Sheep weekend!
It's threatening to turn into potato weekend, because everywhere I went looking for sheep today, I inadvertently learned loads about potatoes. (Including the fact that there's a species of potato that shares it's name with my brother! This amuses me too much.)
( Photos ) |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 20th, 2009|07:15 pm] |
| [ | feeling |
| | crazy | ] | I knew I didn't have enough yarn for my February Lady Cardigan. Do I get the same shade in a different dyelot and pretend it's the same or do I contrast with something else round the bottom?
In other news, on the train home I decided to imagine that everyone in the crowded carriage had my face. I nearly panicked myself out of the window. Bad idea. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 17th, 2009|09:00 pm] |
Following on from last week's Primeval being filmed on the Top Gear track, was half of this week's episode filmed in their studios? Certainly explains the flash cars.
And I've been knitting my February Lady Sweater. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 9th, 2009|12:40 pm] |
| [ | feeling |
| | gloomy | ] | 1. I hate it when I get a high score on a computer game but I spell my name wrong so I have to keep playing to knock the mistake off the high score table.
2. I wish I hadn't realised that I'm too fat to fit in the toaster. It's one of those days when the fact that nobody can fit in the toaster and I don't want to sit in the toaster are no consolation. |
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| Mere trifles |
[May. 5th, 2009|02:59 pm] |
| [ | feeling |
| | busy | ] | Everyone said "don’t buy the rabbit shaped jelly mould - it’s disturbing". But I did and I made a rabbit shaped jelly and it was so disturbing I didn’t really want to take a spoon to it. Every time we opened the fridge door it wobbled like it’s alive and now there’s one slice left and I’ve been sitting here worrying about it.
I would love to be set in a big giant jelly, just to know what it feels like. It would be a dream come true.
Weekend telly was rather good. I liked catching up on the first three episodes of Kirstie’s crafty cottage thingy on 4oD, and last night’s Shield (did you hear my jaw drop? I put down my knitting at one point) and Ashes to Ashes. Primeval seems to be wasting too much time forcing in back-story episodes for people leaving and joining the cast to have any space to make any decent episodes.
Top banana prize goes to Robin Hood, which added Toby Stephens camping it up as a mad, poncing Prince John.
Mouldy banana prize goes to Tonight’s The Night which opened with John Barrowman enthusiastically singing Don’t Stop Me Now to an audience who wanted him to stop. Why is he such a distinctive actor, presenter and personality, but his singing voice is completely indistinguishable from everyone else? He killed the song.
Last night I darned a hole in a sock, proper old-fashioned darning, and it was so satisfying I’m still excited when I think about it. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 2nd, 2009|10:43 pm] |
| [ | feeling |
| | happy | ] | I think my top moment of 2009 happened today.
My brother zipped himself into his new sleeping bag to try it out and was therefore entirely helpless and unable to fight back when I launched a tickling attack on him. Absolute joy. |
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| Plague - Day 5 |
[Apr. 27th, 2009|11:51 am] |
| [ | feeling |
| | sad | ] | It's not pig flu. The GP called it "the nasty virus".
Despite the NHS direct website insisting I see a doctor if I've had all the symptoms at full force for a week, he was puzzled why I was there. I don't know either.
Really fed up and bored with being ill now. Pls to make it go away. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 23rd, 2009|11:14 am] |
| [ | feeling |
| | revolting | ] | Today:
1. plague 2. coughing up five different colours of cataah (pretty! and in the same colours as the fabric I got yesterday. I am so Fashion.) 3. head dried up like a slug in salt overnight 4. head re-hydrated and spectacularly oozing 5. Just popping out to paint a cheery red cross on the door
Why can the human body do this? It's minging. How do I stop catching every single nasty virus, cold and bug that goes round? And omg, Boots Cataah pastiles are the best.
EDIT: Are you just about to have lunch? Because the consistencies of the cataahs were all quite different and facinating too... |
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| Boring update |
[Apr. 22nd, 2009|11:16 pm] |
I went to see today's free catwalk show at the Spitalfields Alternative Fashion Week which was splendid. Some of the things on the catwalk were very good. A collection based on the Arctic was particularly beautiful but someone presented some very badly sewn boring blouse things that made me feel much better about my own sewey incapabilities.
The absolute highlight was Colchester College of Art and Design's show. The students had worked on a project called There's No-one Quite Like Grandad and had made all these mad fashions based on the lives and fashions of men over 60, with lots of tweed and old leather, then got their dads and grandads to model.
Half of the dads were loving it and the other half were wondering how on earth they ended up on a catwalk in central London dressed as a man-shark while the world's fashion press looked on. We decided that there needs to be a law that nobody under the age of 60 is allowed on a catwalk because it is now a proven fact that clothes look much better when modelled by someone with personality than by emo, elongated 18 year olds.
Then I went for a pootle along Oxford Street where I discovered that there are only summer holiday clothes in the shops, nothing even as warm as a cardigan. What are people covering up with this season or am I just being a wuss?
I hunted for some fabric because I sheared all the fabric I have and want to shear some more. Weasel shearing obsession.
And then I met a schoolfriend for dinner. I haven't seen her in so long she's aquired a nephew.
Tired and happy. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 16th, 2009|01:57 pm] |
Poll #1384618 Paperback poll
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: AllYou have a brand new paperback. After you've read it once, it will be... Cracking the spine of a paperback? That new book smell Thoughts on the pleasures of book buying What are you currently reading (the last book you touched if you're reading more than one) Anything else? |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 12th, 2009|11:02 am] |
| [ | feeling |
| | chocolated up | ] | The internets just coughed up a free dress pattern just like my favourite dress! Are my sewing skills up to it? Will I just be wasting another couple of metres of fabric? Who knows.
Yesterday my brother and I spontaneously invented Zombie Tai Chi - if you get up and attempt it right now, it will be so obvious that I don't need to give you instructions. It's fun and excellent for burning off all those Easter treats. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 7th, 2009|12:53 pm] |
I name today as Fashion Crime Tuesday. Are you currently perpetrating or planning a fashion crime today? Brag about it here!
What’s the biggest fashion crime you’ve seen lately? Other than wet-look anything, I’ve also noticed lots of girls going out without their skirts and also in really manky leggings/T-shirt combos which are only really acceptable when slobbing about at home. I was raised to believe that sportswear is only for sport and that’s a very hard belief to change.
I’m actually dressed very boringly today. My dress is a bit too small and there’s dust and space fur all over my black suede pumps because they’re old, but mostly I look normal. Having said that, I am wearing weird purple striped tights.
Ages ago, someone suggested a meme where you photograph what you wore every day for a week. I might do that.
I wish I’d documented everything I wore as a teenager. That would be amusing. Possibly not as amusing as my provisional drivers licence photo which recently made an entire dinner party full of strangers die of laughing and then shout “serial killer” in my face repeatedly. |
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| SUNSHINE!!! |
[Apr. 4th, 2009|04:18 pm] |
| [ | feeling |
| | happy | ] | I scrapped my plans in favour of staying home, sitting on the floor in the sun and untangling a giant bag of messy yarn. Blissful day. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 30th, 2009|06:48 am] |
| [ | feeling |
| | Snotty | ] | Mmm, attractive. And possibly with these it's a Skandinavian initiative to encourage everyone to dress like Bernie Clifton's Emu. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 20th, 2009|10:24 am] |
| [ | feeling |
| | bouncy | ] | I had to send round my final list of Desert Island Discs at work today. It's not a real list because how can you choose eight songs? Realistically, I could manage with 100.
( Here goes.. )
I'm still working on my list of definitive albums so the world can stop worring about it. It's proving to be harder than I though.
In other news, the Camping and Caravan Club have joined twitter. What are they going to tweet? "Still smells of mould!!" "Took a bucket of wee for a walk" "Off to Castle Hammond to drive slowly in the surrounding lanes" |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 19th, 2009|09:34 pm] |
| [ | feeling |
| | thoughtful | ] | I couldn't be bothered to watch part 3 of Red Riding. Is anyone still watching? What tedious brown boredom. Good drama should grip the viewer, make them care what's happening. This doesn't and it should. Just because it's weighty and serious, doesn't make it brilliant.
Things that are good and I am enjoying are the final series of The Shield, CSI, Snog Marry Avoid, NCIS QI, I've Never Seen Star Wars and Stewart Lee's Comedy Vehicle*. And oh the shame of it - I'm hooked on Casualty again.
In other news, I'm really looking forward to The Mentalist. Like everyone else, I am wondering if Mentalist means something else in the US, and if the unfortunate title means that it's going to be funny.
*I saw this on iPlayer the day after everyone else raved about it and it could never live up to that, but it was good. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 17th, 2009|10:46 pm] |
| [ | feeling |
| | exhausted | ] | I tried to buy an apple. The man at the till wouldn't sell it to me because it was "the wrong kind of apple". Then the manager came and said he'd go and get me the right kind of apple. Only they didn't have any of the right kind of apple. So then they didn't know what to do. I suggested they sell me the wrong apple and I'd take my chances. They were horrified and confused but sold it to me anyway. It was lovely. The apple beaurocracy in this country is incomprehensible.
This evening I am sad about Grissom leaving but happy that there's are some new CDs of Cliff Richard archive material coming out. Bad/Good balance restored. |
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